"If you're gonna write something, be honest, Trisha." - Me to myself, just now.
Unfortunately there was an incident this morning where I just came to a point that I could not listen to my daughter talk about hair, make-up, legs, feet, clothes, this girl, that girl, bangs, tights, shirts, pants, fashion, etc. for one more second. I have been listening to it for months now and I just exploded. I just yelled, "Would you please talk about something else besides your freaking shoes, your hair, your eyes, your feet, your height! You're beautiful! I know it's where you are in life right now, but you gotta get past this obsession with your looks and move on! You are who you are, who cares about other people's this and that. You are you! You are beautiful!" I just couldn't take it anymore. It's all she talks about.
I shouldn't have yelled. I know. It bothers me as much as it bothers you but for the love of all that is holy, she isn't even 12 yet. If she is starting all this fashion talk now, what the hell is left for 16? I don't even want to know. Don't get me wrong, I love fashion. I love shopping and doing all that stuff with her, but there's more to life.
The worst part is, I feel it's my fault. When she was younger, I may have been slightly obsessed with fashioin and that may have molded her mind into thinking jeans and sweaters in combination with the right necklace and boot makes the world go round, because it does. Although, like I said, there are other things.
This is where I am at right now, One. I need to bring more discipline, and by discipline I don't mean sending her to her room for online shopping but rather controlling ones self when it comes to things like "fashion". Also bringing more substance into my childrens lives so that the things that youngens can get a little obsessed with, like fashion, can be realized as just what they are. A fun afterthought. Two, Chill out and don't take it too seriously. Three, apologize for yelling.
So, instead of shopping as bonding, we will be doing more museuming as bonding. More science and nature as fun rewards. I'm thinking horseback riding and nature reserves, Music lessons. You see where I'm going with this?
"Let's talk about Science, Kids!" - That will be me.
It's a fine line, folks. One day you think you're doing great as a parent and the next day you think you're an idiot. Most days, both are true.
6 comments:
Science.
SCIENCE!!!
you don't live in Ohio
You call yourself "Trisha"?
But, I know how you feel about the yelling part. sometimes my kids push me to the point and then I yell. And then I feel bad afterward, but I wait a few minutes to break it down to them. But, as far as getting her to concentrate on more wholesome things, that is a toughie. What are the kinds of TV shows she likes to watch? any advice columns for Moms on the internet?
Yeah, Buddy. It IS my name.
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